ATAQ: How do I let go of the past?

Letting go of things you’ve done or things that have been done to you in the past can be difficult. Let’s start with a definition of letting go to make sure we’re all on the same page. To “let go” of something doesn’t mean that you say that what you did or what was done to you is okay or no big deal, nor does it give you or the offender a pass. Like forgiveness, what it means is that you’re … [Read more...]

ATAQ: How do I find peace?

Take a look at everything going on in the world these days, and it’s difficult to be at peace. What it comes down to is this: Being at peace is a personal decision. It’s not necessarily a logical one, but it’s a decision nonetheless. There are several things you can do to find peace within, and I’ll talk about those in a minute. Ultimately, though, it’s a simple decision that gets you there. … [Read more...]

Spiritual Warfare: Prayer

Welcome to the inaugural post of my project with Pastor Ryan Nunez! We are excited to start with a question on prayer today.   Giving credit where it's due, I want to note that Pastor Ryan will be providing the majority of the content for these posts. I present him with the questions, edit and organize the content some and then chime in occasionally in the answers based on my personal … [Read more...]

New Project: Spiritual Warfare

Over my nearly 20 years of practice as a psychologist, I have encountered many people who have questions about Jesus, Christianity, God and the Bible. I, too, have had many questions over the years as I've tried to grow my faith and deepen my understanding of God. I've sought counsel over the years from various people and found it tremendously helpful in combating the enemy's attempt to draw me … [Read more...]

Marriage on Autopilot

The other day, we were in the car headed to the airport. I looked in my bag to make sure I had my phone, and I could not find it but felt certain I threw it in there. Just as I was about to ask my husband to turn around, I set the bag back on the floorboard and found the phone sitting in my lap. To my credit, it did kind of blend in with the dress I was wearing. Ok, not really, but it did get me … [Read more...]

Help for Depression

According to the Mayo Clinic, depression is very common in the United States, affecting people of all ages at a rate of more than 3 million cases per year. According to the DSM-5, the diagnostic manual used by mental health providers, the symptoms of depression vary widely, with the primary identifying symptoms being depressed mood and/or lack of interest in activities. There may also be weight or … [Read more...]

How Do I Stop Being Afraid?

ATAQ: How do I stop being afraid? When we are blocked from doing something, however big or small, it’s fear that’s in charge. Fear is generated by negative automatic thoughts, or NATs, as I call them. These NATs are far more annoying and troublesome than the winged-variety gnats—even when they’re in a swarm! So, how do we overcome the fear that blocks us? Check out these 3 steps: Start by … [Read more...]

You’re Not a 2” x 4”: A Lesson in Dispensability

One of the best and most valuable lessons the Army taught me was that I was dispensable. You may be thinking, "Best--wait, what?" Though our inclination is to see dispensability as a bad thing, it can actually be a really good thing. Let’s take work for example. Maybe you feel like you have to take care of everything at the office. Maybe you feel like things will fall apart if you're not always … [Read more...]

How Do We Measure Love?

It's been on my mind--and heart--to write about love this week. My husband and I have this thing with our kids, as I know many parents do, where we go back and forth with I love you, I love you more, I love you infinity and so on--about the only argument with my kids that I treasure! I say that I love them more and that it's impossible for them to love me more because I gave them life. Somehow, … [Read more...]

Tempted Much?

It's a daily struggle for every single one of us. Temptation comes in many forms. It may be a temptation to engage in a sinful behavior or to stay stuck in dark, negative thoughts that try to pull you away from God and his purpose for your life. What do we do with this challenge? We can't let our thoughts win. We have to shoot them out as quickly as they came in. In the words of Martin … [Read more...]